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So you've discovered you're a vampyre, and right now it feels like it sucks
to be you. Every older vampyre like myself, still remembers what it felt like
to be the "newly awakened", and you're right... it can suck. You're
hungry, you're depressed, you want to rebel against your parents and the world
in general. (And its not a feeling restricted ONLY to youth... we older folks
just rebel against different things, since our parents shouldn't be the problem
once we get out on our own). You don't fit in with most circles of normal peers,
light hurts your eyes, people say you're weird.... You feel like a complete
outcast, or maybe you just feel like you don't fit in anywhere.... Life hurts.
A lot, and frequently.
I'm here to tell you that it doesn't have to be like that. I'm here to tell
you... it gets better. It's really a matter of pulling it all together.
If you've been a vampyre for any length of time you already know what it takes
to just survive. You've probably learned that donors are tough to find, but
there are feeding alternatives. You've most likely come to realize (since you're
reading this) that you are incredibly unlike others around you, but you are
NOT alone. You've faced the fact that your family and friends may never understand
what you are, but you've likely learned that discretion is the better part of
valor... and you can KIND of appear to at LEAST not stand out ALL the time....
and thanks to boards like ours, you don't have to be alone. Its a good start.
But its not enough to SURVIVE... Vampyres CAN thrive!
Yes... it can be tough to be a vampyre... or Therian, or any kind of otherkin.
But what you learn, as you get older, is that each species has gifts that were
given to us to make our lives easier, and keep us on top things.
LET'S START WITH FEEDING....
Yes we need to feed. Its a fact. If you call yourself a vampyre and you DON'T
need to feed in some way or another, then you're fooling yourself... you're
NOT a vampyre if you do not need to feed. And needing to feed starts to feel
like the be-all and end-all that your life revolves around... where will I
find my next donor? What if I can't find a donor? We all know there are alternatives.
We mix our fruity sweet red wine (3 parts) to fresh or frozen blood (one part)
and drink our bloodwine to keep us sane... We drag our steaks over the grill
just long enough to warm the blood inside, and gulp them down 3 times a week
if necessary. It'll get you through the night, though we all know its not
what we crave. Donors! Ah, Sweet donors. But, they are few and far between,
and competition for the ones available, can be disconcerting.... We all know
the problems.
One of the things I've learned is that to stay fed, one should be prepared
to rely on ALL the above AND a bit of psi vamping.
Being a well adjusted vamp relies on a steady supply of food... which for
us, means blood / energy. A mature vampyre realizes that its just not always
possible to have a donor, but that doesn't mean we can go without feeding
when one isn't available. My advice is to learn what works for you and be
diligent about using your back up methods. An unfed vamp is a sick vamp, and
usually an unstable one. Don't do it to yourself... feed frequently and realize...
people can not go without food... and YOU can not go without blood / energy.
Don't try. It's the equivalent of a human starving themselves. "But I
crave blood from a DONOR... NOT animal blood!" I hear it ALL the time.
Yes, I know. I understand.... but you need to feed even when you don't have
a donor. Maturity is realizing that feeding is inevitable and other sources
of food HAVE to be in your back up plan. You don't like animal blood? Too
bad. Quit bitching and starve quietly. Blood is available, even if you don't
like the source. Its like a starving human refusing to eat cause he / she
doesn't like what's on their plate.
That said... nature has given us certain advantages with which to attract
a donor...
"VENUS FLYTRAP SYNDROME"
We are the bright and the enigmatic... we are the "beautiful people".
Vampyric charm is a gift, a rather effective one, at that.
Vampyres are some of the most charming people on the planet, when we are not
feeling sorry for our lot in life. We can smile and the masses fall at our
feet. The opposite sex or the same sex... whatever you're into. If you turn
a well tuned vamp charm on your intended donor/mate/victim/friends the effect
can be amazing.
"Well yes, CG.... I know I can turn on the charm and get my own way...
but is it ethical?"
I can only speak for myself here... but I'm of the opinion that we have
our gifts for a reason. Why throw away our most effective coping mechanism,
based on ethics? And what's wrong with using charm to get what we want,
anyway? I mean... who's stupid idea is THAT? I believe its much better to
attract your flies with honey than to repel them with vinegar and starve.
Besides.... honing this skill makes life SO much easier! Pay attention. Don't
be afraid to turn on the charm. Vampiric charm can be overwhelming... so you'll
need to experiment. Its one of the best tools in our arsenal. but its NOT
the only one.
MAGICK
Energy manipulation is another gift that helps make our lives easier.
If you're a vampyre, and you haven't tried out your magickal abilities, then
you are missing out on one of the truly rewarding gifts of being a vampyre.
We have amazing abilities to work "magick". Like all abilities,
it's a gift that needs to be honed to a skill, but its a skill that comes
easily to us.
Don't overlook it. For those who are skeptical of all magickal working I
have this to say:
Magick is not what people once thought it to be. It doesn't have ANYTHING
to do with being good or evil or even religion, any more than a mathematical
calculation does. Magic is NOT religion. It is Science. And, as such is governed
by laws and principals... cause and effect. Its the art of manipulating energy.
Period. You can prove it too yourself easily: Buy or borrow a "plasma
ball". sit in front of it, a foot or two away. Concentrate on building
a colored energy ball in your hands, rather like picturing yourself building
a snowball only you're building it out of energy. Picture the energy flowing
from your hands and becoming a solid ball between your palms. Picture the
colors swirling in the ball. When you feel the ball is solid, throw it at
the plasma ball. The plasma ball reacts to energy. If you do it right (might
take a try or two, but its easy to master...) the plasma ball will react,
even when the energy ball is thrown from across the room.
Its a gift, folks. Magick is a skill worth having. It can make your like
SO much easier in ways I can't begin to describe in this short article.
INTUITION
Like magick, intuition is also our friend. Vampiric intuition is among the
best I know of... excepting, perhaps, some types of therians, who seem to
be especially instinctive in a very real and very feral way. Use it. Learn
to rely on it. It can and will save you, if you ever need it to. As vamps
we are aware that there are more things out there, than those who live the
more mundane world will EVER realize! Vampiric intuition is another developable
skill. As you get older and more practiced you'll learn to throw out your
intuition like a net. It can tell you if other vampyres are around, if there
are people in your vicinity that would make donors, if there is danger nearby.
It will help you get that job you want (combined with vamp charm), or pick
up the object of your present interest at a bar. So learn to meditate and
learn to use this gift to best advantage! After all... there comes a time
when we come to realize that as vampyres, we have a LOT more control of our
lives and surroundings, then most of us realize and once we stop fighting
our nature and learn to integrate it into our lives we can live very satisfying
and fruitful existence...
But... that's the problem, isn't it? That tendency of ours to fight our nature.
OK... so we're night people and we're often forced into a diurnal existence....
There comes a time when we can stop fighting what we are and order our lives
to our liking. We all grow up and leave home (hopefully). Once that happens
you have, essentially, the ability to control your own destiny. Hate the light?
Get a night job. Don't say "I can't!" - you can. Anyone can! you just
have to stop telling yourself you can't. You don't want to keep your vamp life
a secret? Find a mate you can confide in. "But my lover wouldn't understand!"
then find another lover. You have ALL the skills necessary to change anything
about your life you don't like. Use charm, use magick, use intuition.... MAKE
your life be what you want it to be. You just need to realize that YOU CAN!
As Vampyres we overlook/ignore/get too lazy/forget that we are given our gifts
to compensate for the difficulty of being who we are. Its not wrong to properly
use our gifts to make us the healthy, happy, well adjusted creatures we are
capable of being. I know we tend to fall into depression and we have dark moods...
but Vamps are among the most resilient people I know! We're stronger physically
than most normal humans... We're attractive in ways other species would royally
envy if they new about it! We're often physically attractive and tend to become
more and more attractive as we get older. We have the ability to order our world
around us to our liking using energy manipulation... In reality, we have it
all going for us, once we accept our gifts and learn to take advantage of them.
So... next time the road to being an older vamp gets you down... next time
2nd stage changes become so painful that you don't think you can bear another
day of the physical discomforts, the next time you get depressed enough to want
to commit suicide...REMEMBER: You are in the process of developing into one
of the most powerful and seductive creatures on our planet. And believe me....
the end justifies the means. Learn to use and enjoy the gifts that make being
a vampyre one of the most exciting lives imaginable.
Vampyres were not meant to just "Survive".... WE are capable of being
able to really THRIVE!
Carpe Noctum!
Lady CG
This article is presented as part of an ongoing effort to present other views outside of, as well as within, the online vampire community. Those of us who consider ourselves vampiric don't always look at things from the same viewpoint due to our life experiences. As such, the views and opinions contained in this article are entirely those of the author(s), and may not necessarily be shared by SphynxCatVP. The webmaster is not under obligation to update or otherwise keep current the contents of this article. Most importantly, only you can decide for yourself whether this article or any of the author(s) other views are useful or applicable to you - you are responsible for using your own reasoning and judgement, so judge wisely.
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