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I’ve been asked several times how I came to realize I am a vampire. One
would think it’s the driving need for blood, the constant rumbling that
runs soul deep. Or perhaps it was the "high" I felt when I was finished
feeding. In all actuality, it was none of those. It was the weight loss, loss
of appetite and raging abnormal migraine headaches that lasted for days on end,
with only a scant few hours between attacks.
Trust me, when you're flat on your back with a cold cloth over your eyes hoping
and praying to whatever gods there are that no one will make a sudden movement
near you, and the doctors, specialists and therapists can't find a reason for
the blinding, rampant pain, you have to take matters into your own hands. And
so I did, with the help of a very good friend, who has experience in this area.
If it hadn't been for her, I'd have still been in a great deal of pain (not
that I'm not now – I still am, but it's controllable to an extent).
Let's go back a bit though. I've always been a great nibbler, and I have/had
an extremely bad addiction to Coca-Cola. Rarely in my adult life has a week
gone by where I haven't downed at least a gallon of Coke. Well, that is until
mid-July. Suddenly Coke tasted awful; in fact, everything tasted awful. I'd
been noticing this for a few weeks, but it was almost over night that absolutely
nothing held any flavor or appeal to me. I wanted one thing, and one thing only,
but I didn't want to push it on my partner at the time. D was an open minded
type, but really – having someone cut little slashes into you every chance
she gets? That'd make most people run. Or so I thought – but I'll get to
that some other time.
I wanted blood. My own proved enough at the time to settle things down a little.
I had had quite a feed from D early in the summer, and was managing fine –
although I still at this point didn't completely realize what was what. When
my friend pointed various symptoms out to me, and sent me a link as well as
some files to read over – I knew then. I was reading about me, but I wasn't.
These were other people's experiences, other folks had this desire, this thirst
that wouldn't go away no matter how much thick coffee, strong tea and milk I
drank. Other people with unexplained, abnormal migraines that are totally untreatable
except through heavy sedation (read over the counter and prescription codeine
and sleeping pills). I'd known about my friend - but never, even though she'd
explained this all to me before – never had I put two and two together.
And even if I had, I don't think I would have come up with four, I'd have probably
hit three, or five.
Some fairly common sanguinarian symptoms:
- sensitivity to sunlight on the skin, or bright lights near the eyes
- skin rashes or hives if exposed briefly, severe burning if exposed for any
length of time
- unquenchable thirst
- hungry, but nothing appeals nor tastes good (very rare beef excluded)
- listlessness, hyperactivity
- nocturnal (staying awake at night)
- very heavy sleeper when/if the person can fall asleep
- sudden, unexplainable, abnormal migraine headaches
- some folks mention irritability, irrational behavior
- weight loss as a result of the loss of appetite
- craving for animal protein, even if one is a vegetarian/vegan
- more lucid dreaming, dreams become much more realistic
- nightmares, troubling dreams
These are not all of the possible symptoms, and thus far I've only listed those
I know of for sure either through my own experience, or those who've spoken
to me of theirs. As well, these are mainly for sanguinarian vampires (blood
drinkers), rather than psi-vamps and energy vamps – however – a great
many of them still apply.
I've noticed for myself, that as I've studied this more, and accepted it, things
have evened out a great deal. I no longer have continuous migraines although
I am still bound to the couch and bed about three times a week. This is a great
relief, believe it or not, as I was starting to think I'd never be free of the
pain for even a moment, let alone a day or so at a time. I don't have a donor
right now, but little sips of my own blood, along with the occasional feed of
energy from a storm, a party or a friend will get me through until I do find
another one.
Hmmm…I've used some terms here you may not recognize. I guess that'll
lead into the next article!
Until next time folks, happy nibbling!
By Jodi Wetherup (shadowrider/ierne)
Originally published 2 January, 2004 @ Suite101.com
This article is presented as part of an ongoing effort to present other views outside of, as well as within, the online vampire community. Those of us who consider ourselves vampiric don't always look at things from the same viewpoint due to our life experiences. As such, the views and opinions contained in this article are entirely those of the author(s), and may not necessarily be shared by SphynxCatVP. The webmaster is not under obligation to update or otherwise keep current the contents of this article. Most importantly, only you can decide for yourself whether this article or any of the author(s) other views are useful or applicable to you - you are responsible for using your own reasoning and judgement, so judge wisely.
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